Faking It Episode 106 Recap: I Promise This Threesome Won't Be Weird At All

Cut to the Love Shack, where the Bros are setting Liam up with his special warming lube and pleasure condoms. Liam’s concerned that the room is a bit sleazy rather than romantic, but the boys insist that it’s actually the #1 Best Threesome Location Spot Ever Of All Time and that threesomes aren’t romantic. They also have lots of advice for him.

...and fiddle-faddles. Don't you DARE forget the fiddle-faddles. — …and fiddle-faddles. Don’t you DARE forget the fiddle-faddles.

The bros inform Liam that he’s gotta groom his body hair, give each girl equal time, kiss the girl he is less interested in first, and also “go all night” to “please both ladies.” Specifically they suggest he remain hard. These guys are geniuses, wow.

What do you think, it's a new idea I have for t-shirts — What do you think, it’s a new idea I have for t-shirts

Don't you dare tell him you don't like his t-shirt idea — Don’t you dare tell him you don’t like his t-shirt idea

I CAN'T LIE TO YOU I HATE YOUR T-SHIRT IDEA — I CAN’T LIE TO YOU I HATE YOUR T-SHIRT IDEA

Backstage at the Dance Performance, Shane apologizes to Lauren for wearing a ridiculous outfit and says he’ll do the routine in the boring outfit as rehearsed. Lauren says he wore it just to piss her off and to attract Pablo and she knows this ’cause she would’ve done the exact same thing.

Shane: “We are nothing alike! I’m not —”
Lauren: “Arrogant? Self-centered? Controlling? Sure you’re not. Face it, we are not good poeple.”
Shane: “Hey, I care about issues.”
Lauren: “Yeah issues that directly affect YOU. Listen, Pablo believes the best in people. He’s a romantic. He’s longing for “the one.” You go through guys like a chainsaw through puppies. You’d break his heart and not think twice about it.”

No I am not doing Showgirls roleplay with you

Then they go out on the dance floor to win and triumph over adversity so that nobody ever has to be alone or sad ever again amen praise Jesus.

Cut to the love shack, where the triumphant threesome are sitting awkwardly on a bed. Karma volunteers to break the ice… literally. Like there’s an ice bucket and she needs to chop it up? I don’t know what kids are into these days. Probs it’s some party drug.

Soooo ladies, which one of you wants to call the pizza guy — Soooo ladies, whose turn is it to call the pizza guy?

Liam awkwardly messes around with his iPod until he gets some not-awful music going and then everybody’s still awkward and then Amy is like, okay you both are lunatics, fuck this nonsense, let’s get this show on the ROAD.

Amy: “Is this a threesome or a staring contest? Let’s do this.”

YOU GUYS I LOVE AMY SO MUCH. Anyhow, she disrobes, revealing a lingerie situation that reminds me of Miss August 2011.

I DARE YOU TO RESIST ME — Resist THIS, bitches

We return to the Dance Contest Big Bang, where SHANE AND LAUREN GOT THIRD PLACE! Now they’ll get to go to the regional competition of life and hopefully will beat New Directions FOREVER.

Pablo invites Shane on a date to save puppies or something but Shane says no:

Shane: “That’s a really sweet offer, Pabs. Lauren is right — you’re a good guy. I’m just not really the dating type and I don’t wanna lead you on. I can’t believe I just said that because I think you’re really hot but I just did and no takebacks so BYE!”

Don't tell mom, the babysitter's dead — Don’t tell mom, the babysitter’s dead

Shane gives Pablo a quick kiss and dashes off into the sunset as tango music plays in the glorious sun over the earth and sea.

Back at The Love Shack, Amy is faced with the daunting task of removing Karma’s trench coat, and this time she does it all “sexy-like” in a way that feels, in fact, totally natural.

OK I think we need to stand back to back though to figure out who's taller for real — OK I think we need to stand back to back though to figure out who’s taller for real

Karma looks nervous, Liam looks like he’s about to come in his pants. Amy looks sexy. She touches Karma’s hair and whispers, “relax.” Karma is nervous.

This is my very best Olivia Pope smile and I hope it inspires you to be the best you can be right now, Karma — This is my very best imitation of Olivia Pope’s “you can rise to this challenge”smile

Now I'm smiling and telling you to chill the fuck out okay — Now I’m smiling and telling you to chill the fuck out okay

Now you are scared in a good way — Now you are scared in a very calm and expectant way

Amy looks long and deep into Karma’s eyes, then at her lips, and then they kiss, and then they keep kissing.

“Whoa,” says Karma, stunned and reeling.

Now you realize I am pretty much the best thing of all time

“I know,” says Amy, because she’s known all along.

YEAH NO DUH — NOW YOU REALIZE KISSING GIRLS IS THE ALL-TIME BEST

Liam, who has no idea what kind of scene this is, lunges towards Amy, doing that thing his friends told him to do where he kisses the girl he likes less, first.