Ellen Scaring The Pants Off Sarah Paulson Is The Three Minutes of Surprise Joy You Need Today

If you, like me, are not watching American Horror Story: Cult for all the reasons Riese has articulated repeatedly here on Autostraddle dot com (plus a general distrust of Ryan Murphy and a startle reflex more pronounced than a baby kitten in a thunderstorm), Ellen has answered your prayers by scaring the figurative pants off Sarah Paulson on an episode of television it feels good to watch. This is one of those very rare videos where you know exactly what’s going to happen, yet watching it unfold is a delight.

Tag yourself. I’m the Sarah under the table clutching at the closest lesbian going, “I’m really scared something else is going to happen!”